5 Ways to Bacon – You Suck at Cooking (episode 88)

The first method of cooking bacon
is the classic pan flip. Put the heat on medium, lay in the bacon strips while the pan is still cold, Let it cook for however many minutes you think
is a good amount of minutes to cook bacon on that side, then flip the strips over and cook them
for however many minutes you think is good to cook bacon on the other side. Then you can decide if you wanna soak up
some of the excess grease with paper towels to make it more crispy, Or eat it the way Jesus intended: extra greasy. This method is great if you: The next method is what I call the Trudy method, which was showed to me by my friend Trudy, whose name I change to protect her identity, it’s actually Tammy, who learned it from her dad Jim, whose name is Bob. You put in a bunch of bacon and
you just consistently wangjangle it. No flipping, no nonsense, just an even stir. This method is great if you: The next method is the one side no flip, no touch lazy fuck method I developed this method one time
when I was cooking bacon while distracted which is how I always cook bacon, and everything else. For this method, you lay bacon strips into the pan
on a bit lower than medium, then you give yourself blisters trying to
get into spoon carving while you wait, and then BAM, what you get is bacon
that’s both crispy and fatty at the same time. Is it a coincidence that bacon is both
made of particles but shaped like a wave? I’d say yeah? This method is great for anyone who is: Real talk, if there are kids in the house,
don’t ever use the front burner, thank you. For this next method, you’ll need a plate,
some paper towels, and a Laser beam box Simply lay the bacon onto a paper towel, cover it, and put it in for around a minute per strip, then remember that your sister gave you this laser beam box because the spinny thing doesn’t work, so it’s a bit uneven, but ultimately gets the job done. This method is great if you: And finally, we have the baking method, which is the whole reason I made this video,
’cause baking bacon is the best, it’s literally got the word ‘bake’ in it. Put one side of your parchment paper with bacon, then coat the other side of your parchment paper with pan. Put your ondo on 370 fundo, slide that into your kitchen hot box for 10 to 15 minutes, soak up some of that excess grease with paper towels, and get the best textured bacon ever, which could be described as good, also, great, also, really good, also, perfect, and also, satisfactory. This method is great if you want to: Remember that crispy preferences are personal, and every stove and oven cooks differently. So you have to eyeball this stuff
until it’s cooked just how you want it. So what do you do with that bacon grease? First off, you wait until it cools before you handle it
and I can’t stress that enough. Then if you want, you can make a bacon fat salad dressing. This is three tablespoons of bacon fat, two teaspoons of red wine vinegar, one teaspoon of dijon, some salt and pepper pepper pepper, and few drops of honey. You can also wait until it cools more
and turns into keto frosting, then you can put it on your almond flour
cupcakes, or dispose of it. If you want to pour your bacon grease down the drain, Even with hot water it eventually cools, solidifies, and becomes somebody else’s problem. The only exception to this is Also, a lot of people think this is a myth, (MUSIC STARTS)
Also, a lot of people think this is a myth, but you can actually put
up to two tablespoons of bacon grease into the gas tank of a car of someone you
really, really, really don’t like. ♪ I wake up in the morning still sleepy ♪ ♪ and I reach for you ♪ ♪ You’re gone already, and I wish I hadn’t slept ’til two ♪ ♪ But just as I’m about to fall back asleep ♪ ♪ I hear a quiet sizzle that’s starting to creep ♪ ♪ But the stairs through air and to the room ♪ ♪ And I know what you’re up to ♪ ♪ The bacon’s in the pan and so delicious ♪ ♪ There with you ♪ ♪ And even though it’s only the start ♪ ♪ Promise me one thing ♪ ♪ Or I might fall apart ♪ ♪ Tell me you’ll never stop cooking the ♪ ♪ Bacon inside of my heart ♪ ♪ Yeah ♪ ♪ Oh baby don’t stop cooking that ♪ ♪ Bacon inside of my heart ♪ ♪ Yeah ♪

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