BRITISH ASMR – SEBASTIAN ROASTING COMMENTS!

BRITISH ASMR – SEBASTIAN ROASTING COMMENTS!


Welcome back to another “Sebastian Roasts,” where the burns certainly are hotter than Ciel’s parents. (intro music) (WHOOSH) (reads comment as it is) (OOC) Why did we start on this one? *laughing* (OOC) Fuck! *like a giggly bitch* (A-WHOOSH) (reads comment) Oh, Kaptain FoxBear… (starts laughing) Just because you put an emoji at the end of a sentence- does not make the sentence complete. We put… PERIODS at the end of OUR sentence in English, NOT emojis… (emphasizes with slaps) Emojis do NOT count as PERIODS!! Erin says, (reads comment) So Erin, I went on your channel page just to have a general nose around, and I–… I couldn’t help but find something rather interesting in your liked videos playlist. Erin, my dear, it is completely understandable, normal, AND acceptable to listen to a 3-hour sex playlist, after watching Yuri on Ice and Mystic Messenger videos. It’s only natural; we’ve all been there. (A-WHOOSHSKY) Clorox Bleach says, (yells comment) Sounds like a very refreshing beverage. (and a WHOOSH) Ohoho, this one’s a VERY saucy one. (clears throat) (reads comment as dramatic as it looks) Oh, and look, they’ve added a little note at the end for me. (SHWOOSHK) (reads other comment) (starts crying) Could I tell Claude that? (still crying) I work hours in the Phantomhive Manor… and nobody pays me any attention! And all I want… i-is a- just a- just a compliment here and there, y-you know– (stuttering) and I go online to get compliments from people… A-and I then get this, I-I– I get THIS! What am I supposed to do? Where’s that Clorox Bleach fellow? (COMING THROUGH) OneHellOfAButlerPlays says… (reads comment) As are you, judging by your grammatical errors. You forgot to capitalize the stupid– (laughs to self) ironically, as well as forgetting the period at the end of the sentence. Come on, this is basic stuff, now, dear! (PARDON ME) (reads comment) You see… swearing is a fantastic tool at conveying emotion. And right now I’m going to swear, and convey how DISGUSTED I am by your FUCKING GRAMMATICAL MISTAKES!! (SQUEEZING THROUGH) Melody Ortiz says… Oh my gosh! What- wh-what kind of writing is that?! I haven’t listened to PPAP enough to understand this, what the hell? Looks like I’ll have to bring in an expert for this one. (sigh) Nyanas? (what?) N-Nyanas… NYANAS!! They’ve done that funny language again! Yes, of COURSE I want help! (HELLO FRIEND) Huuuuhhhhh? Do you need my help AGAIN? UH- oh- We’re recording? Um… *clears throat* (higher voice) Let me check my… special anime language book! (giggles stereotypically) Ok, let’s see here. Uhhh… What are these… strange hieroglyphics? U-umm… Just leave it to me, I’m an expert here. (sure you are) Sebaaaah… Sebasu… channnnn… WAAAA… se… seKU– SEKUSU–… (trying not to laugh, are you?) sekusu… no… s-sekusu no hato! OOOHHHHH, I get it now! This person is trying to communicate- that you are… a sexy, hot seabass! Now if you need me, I’ll be in my chambers dusting off the boobs on my anime figures. Goodbye. (BACK TO SEBBY) Ah. I see then. I regret everything. (NEW COMMENT PLS) (reads comment) What on Earth is this question?! Who came up with this?! Wha-… In what world is this a mind-boggling question?! Ciel Phantomhive says, (reads comment) Well, why don’t you go and ask your parents about roasting, and then get back to me? (short laugh) O-oh wait! Kyumino Playz says, (reads comment) I can’t believe you just assumed my sexuality! (ANGRY SWOOSH) WHERE is my Tumblr blog?! This needs to be posted… (slap) ASAP! Tabitha Trinidad says, (reads comment) Unlike your grammar, apparently, because you didn’t capitalize the ‘just’ after the sentence! Come ON now! *claps hands furiously* (MORE WHOOSH) (reads comment with just enough enthusiasm and slaps) (HABASWOOSH) Billie Tanton says, (reads comment) How fabulous. (okay enough swooshes) (reads comment) Well, I beg to differ, peasant! Your description says, (reads this poor, unfortunate person’s channel description) I’m still waiting for the content, Ashlyn, and you also spelled “and” incorrectly; there’s no capital. (reads comment) Oho, you do flatter me, but you should also… DEFINITELY check up the definition of pedophilia, because… I think you’re a little confused on what stands as pedophilia. CreepyPasta 10145 says, (reads comment) I believe it was derived from something Japanese, and now we have lemons. So now when God gives you lemons… you make hentai. Sweet… sweet, buttery hentai. (reads comment) Well– (sigh) you know, they do start young nowadays. Julie Long says, (reads comment) Well, although you may be correct there, it’s EXTREMELY easy to find Black Butler SEASON 2, I think you meant. Simply go to YouTube and type in, “Does Elizabitch– “Jumin Han– “Bee Movie in seven minutes or less,” and then you will find it. You’re welcome, peasant. (reads comment) Funny enough you said that, I actually (slap) LOVE to grammar, bro! (reads comment) You know, when I was 11, I used to take my sexual frustration out on a Teletubby. (softly) My God, it was a good time. Jade Smith says, (reads comment) (breaks character and starts laughing at grammar) (OOC) Lemon fabrics–! (descends into fit of laughter) (in the distance, still laughing) LEMON FABRICS!! (laughing like a giggly bitch) (OOC) What the fuck is a lemon fabric?! (more inane laughing) (OOC) I fucking love these comments. (continues reading whilst trying not to laugh again) (fails) (reads comment) (slap) GOD YES!!! NOTHING makes me bust a nut quicker than a perfectly grammatical sentence! (reads comment) Oh, Chinenye Igwe, I beg to differ. 1. You spelled “you” incorrectly, and you didn’t even capitalize it! Oh, come ON, dear! (slaps for emphasis) You can do BETTER than this… CHINENYE IGWE!! (reads comment) Don’t you mean what on Earth your GRAMMAR come to? Look at that! WHAT?! You need to capitalize the W, dear– (more slaps for effect) COME ON!! HOW many EPISODES do I HAVE to MAKE?! (reads comment) Octavia, please, I’m losing my patience… What o- what on Earth are you trying to get across with this comment?! I’m SO CONFUSED! (reads comment) Me too, dear, me too. (reads comment) Is my content not garbage enough already? Is that REALLY what you want? (reads comment) And that’s what the nun said to my pe– (NOPE) (reads comment) PurpleBlaziken says, (reads top half of comment) Well, my dear, imagine no longer! (ASMR) Just sit back and relax… Imagine it getting really wet, going in… (where are you going with this?) and out– of the teacup, (that was a close one) getting really nice– a really nice brown color on that cup of tea now. Oh, yes. (reads comment normally) LISTEN HERE, Miyuki2319… I make the grammatical… fixes… of things, so YOU– you- you better stop! You better stop fixing MY grammar, because it’s gonna make me look real, REAL fucking dumb, and… a-a- tha- that wouldn’t… that would look… ter-terrible. N-next o- NEXT ONE! (reads comment oh so spookily) (nervous) UMM… Do you, though? Do you? (reads comment) Or would you rather me fix your grammar, bitch? LET’S GO!! You’ve only made one mistake, and you capitalized “kiss” a second time! There was no need to! I’M the only winner here! Let’s go… Sebastian on top– (slap) 20 years in a row! (reads comment) Well, sometimes, you know, pussy needs a bit of grooming, or if it needs cleaning, I’m happy to lick away, you know, it’s only natural. It’s how they would do it in the wild. (reads comment) And that concludes today’s comments! Great job, everybody! (slap) Let’s go home! Tickle my asshole– (starts laughing) Fuck me… What has my life come to? Yeah, I’ll- I’ll- I’ll stop shouting soon, Don’t- don’t worry. Would you rathe– (breaks into a fit of laughter) WHAT?! Tabitha Trinidad says– oh fuck, I need to burp. (belch) (random Rich Sanchez impression) Morty, Morty, ge– Hey… (starts singing) What a wonderful kind of day! (claps to own beat) And we learn to walk and play! And get along with each other–! Ishouldprobablyreadthecommentnowww! Chinenye Igwe says, (almost immediately starts laughing) Who else is watching this on the toilet seat…? What the fuck? What the fuck? (still laughing) Please! Erin, my dear, it’s completely understandable that you would want a s–… (what a giggly bitch, amirite?) What the fuck, Erin? Erin, my dear, it’s completely understandable that you would want to listen to a s–… 3-hour fucking playlist of sex… (I told you) Sebas… chaaaaan… waaaa… SEK… SEEEeeehh… SEKSHIIIIII– (also starts laughing as outro music plays) Uh… Forget that. (outro music)

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