Sandwich of Justice – You Suck at Cooking (episode 25)

Sandwich of Justice – You Suck at Cooking (episode 25)


🎵 You suck at cooking 🎵 🎵 Yeah you totally suck 🎵 The Sandwich of Justice was first discovered by my friend Ryan many years ago. I took his version of the Sandwich of Justice and developed my own because I was vegetarian at the time. I’m no longer vegetarian for ethical reasons but I still make this version of the sandwich because it’s so delicious. But you can feel free to add bacon. The first thing you want to do is put some olive oil in a pan throw in some onion add in some garlic and then pour in some hash browns. Add in a little pepper pepper pepper and add in a pinch of salt. This little salt holder was a gift from my friend Jenny keeps it double fresh. While this is cooking, you can do all the rest of the prep. What you need is thin wisps of a dill pickle thicker wisps of sliced tomato you want to throw some cheddar through a shredder have some avocado on standby and as the potatoes are getting close to finished you’re going to want to get your eggs ready. As I mentioned before you always want to just be respectful and give your eggs a minute before you actually cook with them. [Law and Order sting] Hey, Dennis. Hey, Chief. It’s late, why don’t you hit the bricks. I will soon. What are you working on? Oh, nothing. Oh, for crying out loud, Dennis it wasn’t a homicide. I know I’m close, Chief, it just doesn’t make sense! YOU don’t make sense. What do you mean? It’s like, you say, “Look at that car” and I say, “You’re a car.” Oh. It’s a joke. Right. Look at the video, Chief. Dennis: You ever seen an egg jump like that? Chief: No. You want to know WHY? No! Dennis: Look right there. There’s a human. Finger. [dog barking] Dennis: Figgles, shut up! Chief: Human fingers is how 99% of us die these days. So what? It wasn’t John and Douglas in that water, I know it! They murdered two innocent eggs and made an escape. You know what you sound like? A God damn lunatic. Dennis, look at me. I am looking at you. I know. Is everything… alright? Chief: Are you doing…okay? You know, Chief ever since Alex died– Oh, shut up! You lost a partner, boo-frigging-hoo I’ve had 27 partners ended up as omelets. Shut your facehole and go home there’s no case here, Dennis. Maybe you’re right. Of course I’m right, that’s my job as the chief of police I’m always right. [sound of a fire starting] Did you just burn a pile of evidence? Yes. A fire, right here in your office? Yes. Good man! Get a good sleep, we’ll see you tomorrow. Chief always knows best. [dog barking] Dennis: Figgles, I swear to God. [offscreen] Detective Dennis? Yes, sir. I believe you’ve been looking for me. I have? Sorry, I didn’t catch your name? You can call me John. I always like to pepper pepper pepper them up. This is the period of crucial timing. I’ve prepared the avocado the hash browns are almost done. The bread you need has got to be wide enough. If you go too small the structural integrity of the sandwich will be compromised. Toast goes in. While that’s happening we’re going to get the eggs started. Throw those bad boys in. Toast is ready. While the eggs are still cooking (they’ll be done soon) Ryan insists the best way to spread mayonnaise is with a spoon so let’s do that. That’s way too much mayo. Let’s take some off. Next layer is the hash browns. Put a nice layer not too thick and scrunch them in to the bread. Get your cheese onto the hash browns. Your perfectly-timed egg comes in and creates a “cheese furnace” and also a layer of glue at the same time but not the kind made from horses. It’s made from chickens. Just a touch of ketchup for sweetness and also for traction. Now we’ve got our pickles. My God, do not skip this step. If you don’t like pickles get your head checked. We’re going to throw on our tomatoes little bit of mayo on your second piece of toast and then the avocado. Look at that creamy deliciousness. Try to deny it I dare you. Bam. You want to slice it in half diagonally. Look at this you don’t even need two hands. If you wanted to, say, like go driving around and eat at the same time you can totally do that. It’s also safe. Look at that what are we at, almost 90 degrees? Jesus! The fun thing about it is when you give it to someone you can say “justice is served”. That’s Ryan’s line. I built my whole life on the backs of my friends. [Law and Order sting] You know, Dennis, I’ve been thinking… Oh my God. Chief: No. 🎵 You suck at cooking 🎵 🎵 Oh my God, you suck 🎵

100 thoughts on “Sandwich of Justice – You Suck at Cooking (episode 25)”

  1. Everything about this video was absolutely perfect. Only thing I’d say would be – you didn’t use all your eggs or hash browns. Maybe save one of the eggs and add it to the hash browns right as they finish cooking so you could make a sort of patty and get more of that crispy goodness on this God of a sandwich!

  2. How would you describe that style of egg? I cook mine like that but when I go to a restaurant, and they ask how I want my eggs I don’t know what that style is called so I end up saying scrambled

  3. 3:30 Ryan must be drunk!!!😂😂 how can a round surface of a spoon spread better than a flat surface from a knife? xD are u guys magicians?😂

  4. I don't like mayonnaise, pickles or tomato slices personally. The mayo can be replaced by soft butter though, so I guess that means I only need to get my head checked twice

  5. Says you suck at cooking trying to teach people all the wrong ways to cook. The steps you have taken was all wrong. It might be somewhat edible but this is no Oscar. 2/10. Btw never season eggs before you cook them it breaks down the egg. Quit youtube

  6. First of all that was interesting second of all what just happened third of all I'm sooo gonna try making that looks delicious good work bro

  7. I’ve watched this video at least a half dozen times over the last couple years. It’s taken me this long to actually appreciate the amount of effort that detective scene probably took making that office diorama/set. Good on you.

  8. I actually made this sandwich today. Half the ingredients fell off and I got avocado all over my fingers… WORTH IT. This sandwich tastes amazing. And it was a great comfort after what happened to Denis.

  9. I can't help but chant "pepper pepper pepper" when seasoning food now.

    Perhaps a subconscious yet futile attempt to please the unruly and chaotic energy of YSAC watching over me…

    send help

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